A Day in the Life with Triplets (by Meghan)

Wow!  I can't believe it's only been a week since we've written. -Scratch that...another week has gone by now.  We didn't get a chance to edit pictures so here we are a week later still trying to publish this post!  It feels like an eternity in some ways and it feels like just yesterday in others.  It's weird how that happens!

Well let's start with the most important thing first: We made it! (Through a week and a half with no live-in grandma help.) Not by ourselves that's for sure!  We have had a lot of support this week from friends and family near and far.  We received a large food delivery from a church group which was set up by a fellow triplet mom.  Then our dear friend Sarah and the wonderful Hubbard family set up a food delivery program online.  Sarah had been asking me for a list of people to send it to and I hesitated for a long time because I didn't think anyone would want to send us food.  And I sometimes feel very guilty accepting all this support.  I don't exactly know how to explain it.  I feel very, very appreciative, but also very guilty.  Anyway, the other night we had a surprise delivery at our door. Pizza from our friend Tara at Mt. Eagle.  I can't say I've ever been that big of a fan of pizza.  We usually order it once every few months.  But that pizza was amazing.  The time it saved not having to make a plate and warm something up.  And, the best part is I could easily hold a baby while eating with the other hand.  I think pizza might be our new favorite food!  :)  Then yesterday Jeremy got on the site and saw all the people who are sending us food.  I couldn't believe it.  If some of you are reading this, thank you so much from the bottom of our hearts!  I never knew how difficult it would be to find time to grocery shop and make something to eat.  It is such a blessing to have food just show up at the door. We are truly grateful!

As many of you know, this week was particularly rough because we were on our own without moms (grandmas) staying with us helping around the clock for the first time since Sophia came home on October 14th.  We had a lot of local family members come over to help us make the transition.  Shallee (my cousin) and her daughter Kylie actually came to stay for a few nights to help with the dreaded night shift. Once they left we had to cover all night on our own.  As you can guess, this was not a week of much sleep for us.  I actually fell asleep while I was NG feeding Isabelle and spilled the syringe of breast milk all over!  That was a rude awakening! Thank you Shallee, Kylie, Aunt Mary, and Kelly for chipping in and helping us take care of these sweet girls!  Thankfully we have finally hired a nanny to help. I thought since I was staying home we wouldn't need a nanny, but as you see below I was in for a rude awakening.

Every time I'm the one posting I try to tell it truthfully.  Whether it's scary outcomes that could result from Izzy's surgery or worst and best case scenarios.  So, I do want to just share for a moment how hard this really is...what life is really like for us with triplet infants.  I have to really make an effort to get myself into the shower every 3-4 days. Many days it gets to the late afternoon and I realize I haven't brushed my teeth. I haven't left the house in three weeks accept for doctor appointments. There is always a baby who is fussing and needs to be held.  None of my time is my own to watch a show, or return a call to a friend, or go to the bathroom, or exercise.  I'm sure having a baby is an adjustment for any first-time parents, but having three, and one with special needs, is a monumental life overhaul. I have to say I did have a little bit of an adjustment period when I needed some time to accept that. Now that I have,  I'm enjoying every minute (Wait a minute! That's not true...I'm enjoying many moments, but there are rough times too.) Every day I am in awe of their growth and so sad it's another day I'll never get back again.  At the same time I wish they would just hold their bottles already so I could feed more than one at a time!  Time is so fleeting with infants who seem to change every moment. We are so lucky!

Let me fill you in about our day starting in the evening.

6:30-7:30 pm - Feed Izzy
7:30-8:00 pm - Give Maddy meds and feed Sophia
8:00-8:45 pm - Feed Maddy (She needs to be held for at least 30 minutes after eating, but sometimes she needs to be held for hours.  It just depends on the feeding.)
8:45 pm -  All kids are down in bed and sleeping  
9:00 pm - Give Izzy her meds
9:30 pm - Hook up Izzy's NG feeding.
9:30-11:30 pm -  The rush is on...I rush to get pumping and ready for bed so I can sleep a little bit.  Usually by the time I tidy up, get ready for bed, and pump it's between 10 and 11.  Jeremy rushes downstairs to get bottles ready for the next day, washes bottles from that day, tidies up a bit more and then comes up to bed.  He tries to get a bit of sleep.
12:00-12:45 am - Jeremy feeds Maddy and adds more milk and resets Izzy's pump.
2:00-6:00 am - There is no break until morning. The pump goes off, the monitor alarms (usually for no reason!), Sophia cries for her pacifier, Maddy spits up and screams her head off until you come in and hold her for a while, Izzy cries because she needs a diaper change, Sophia cries because she needs a diaper change, Izzy pulls out her NG tube, Maddy's crying because she's constipated, Sophia needs to be re-swaddled, the reasons are endless!
3:15-3:50 am - I wake up and pump.
4:00-4:45 am - Feed Maddy and reset Izzy's pump
5:00-6:30 am - Each morning I think today will be the day they'll let me go back to sleep.  I lay down and start to fall asleep and the second that happens someone starts crying. I've timed it...it's usually about every 10 to 20 minutes someone needs me so at some point I give up and hang out on FB on the iPad in the nursery, helping as needed. 
7:00 am - Bring each girl downstairs as they wake, put them in the swing and hope they'll be content and quiet while you run upstairs to get the others and try to scarf down a bowl of cereal. 
7:30-8:00 am - Give Maddy meds and feed Sophia.
8:00-8:45 am - Feed Maddy
9:00 am - Give Izzy meds
9:30-10:30 am - Feed Izzy
10:30-11:00 am - Pump
11:30-12:00 pm - Feeding frenzy starts again! Get meds for Maddy and feed Sophie. 
12:00-12:45 pm - Feed Maddy
12:30-1:30 pm - Feed Izzy
1:30-2:00 pm - Pump
2:00-3:15 pm - get s#*t done
3:30-4:30 pm -  Feed Izzy
3:30-4:00 pm - Feed Sophia
4:00-4:45 pm - Feed Maddy
5:00-6:00 pm - Try to feed ourselves and bounce around helping/holding fussy babies
6:30-7:30 pm - Feed Izzy.
7:30-8:00 pm - Meds for Maddy and feed Sophia
8:00-8:45 pm - Feed Maddy and we're back up to bed.

Do you see all the overlap?!!! Izzy's on an every three hour schedule while the other two eat every four. So, no matter how we arrange the schedule there are some feedings where there is a lot of overlap and some where they're eating every hour for three hours straight.  Maddy's reflux is horrible and makes her a very high-maintenance baby.  Each feeding with her takes at least 45 minutes and sometimes she needs to be held most of the three hours in between each feeding. Then there's sweet Izzy.  She usually takes about an hour to feed.  We start off with the bottle and then NG whatever is left.  She's a very slow bottle feeder and she cries and spits up if the NG goes to quickly.  Thankfully Sophia takes 10-15 minutes to feed and can burp and go down to her bouncy five minutes later if we need her to. We're so thankful for one easy baby, but we have major feelings of guilt because we spend so much more time with the other two. Hopefully as the others grow we'll be able to equal out the attention a bit more!

In the few hours of down time, there are so many tasks to fit into the day: washing bottles, making bottles, bathing babies, showering ourselves, eating, laundry, folding and putting away laundry, going to the doctor, calling doctors' offices and Early Intervention for appointments, sifting through the obscene amounts of paperwork that we get from bills, to insurance explanation of benefits, write a blog post, return calls to friends and family, grocery shopping, diaper and other necessity shopping, sleep, feed our poor neglected kitty, kitty litter, breast pumping.  If we have fussy babies all of these things get put on hold until we can find a free moment.

Needless to say, while it may be possible for one person to take care of three babies, it is not possible for one person to take care of these three babies. Thank goodness we finally hired a nanny!  I have sad feelings about this too.  I really want to do this myself, soaking up every second of their lives and not sharing it with anyone but Jeremy and close friends and family. For now though, I need to accept the fact that I need help.  Hopefully, as they grow, that will change or at least lessen as time goes on.

We've taken some great pics this week.  We'll leave you with them.  Sorry some of them have been revealed on FB already.  I couldn't wait to share!

Happy New Year everyone!

Meghan

Izzy's meds before bed


Maddy's meds in the morning and evening


Giving Maddy her meds


This is just after a couple of hours of "triplet life"


We had to move Maddy to the Rock 'n Play on the left.  That's her monitor over there.  On the right, is Isabelle's pump.


The nanny with Izzy



Meg and her girls


Madness on the Mat!


Maddy, catching some z's




Sophia, lounging with her Wubbanub


Izzy, working up her stamina


Sophie, figuring out what's happening with Baby Einstein

Wait A Minute. 2011 Is Already Over!?!

Where did this year go?  What a whirlwind.  The holidays are winding down and all of our help is preparing to depart back to their own homes.  Meg and I are still on the search for a full-time nanny or "mommy's helper" to make it through the day when I'm at work.  Every day is still hectic, but I'm always amazed each morning when I wake up, see our girls faces, and notice the changes in each of our girls from the day before.

Today is New Year's Eve, a day when most of us stop for a moment and reflect on the previous year.  A day when you briefly analyze the things that went well during the year and those that you vow to improve upon in the next.   I can say, without a doubt, that 2011 has been the most amazingly, busy, scary, exhausting, exciting, hectic, surprising, and wonderful year of my life.  I think having kids has that effect on most.

Speaking of kids, here's a quick summary of how everyone's doing.  If this blog post is already too long for you, just know that all of the girls are progressing extremely well and are ready to ring 2012 in with a bang!

Sophia seems to be the most mild-mannered of the bunch.  She will sometimes sleep a seven hour stretch at night which makes mommy and daddy very, very happy parents :)  She usually smiles in the morning, after you change her diaper.  She cries the least and weighs the most, coming in right around 11 lbs as we wrap up the year.  She enjoys time on her back on the activity mat, trying to hold her head up when she's on her belly, and looking around the room with bobblehead-like coordination (she's actually a little better than a bobblehead when we give her some trunk support).

Isabelle weighed in at a svelte 7 lbs 4 oz the other day.  She's acclimated to home life, away from the NICU, quite well.  She probably gives the most eye contact out of the three girls.  She loves being held, a trait she picked up from the NICU nurses at Edward (thanks Melissa and Linda).  She's still on a continuous feed throughout the night, which actually allows her to sleep nine to 10 hours straight, which makes her a fan favorite right away :)  She was the first to really start noticing her hands, at least eating them anyway.  I think she realizes there's a thumb there that may be an easy replacement for a pacifier.  Let's hope she learns quickly because being the Chief Pacifier Retrieving Officer is a job I'm ready to give up.

Madelyn finishes up the year with chubbier cheeks and brighter eyes.  She's still on multiple medications to help with her reflux.  Overall, she seems much happier throughout the day and you just can't keep yourself from looking at her angelic face when she stares right back at you.  She weighed in around 10 lbs and seems to be catching up with Sophia.  We're only letting her sleep for four-hour stretches, primarily to make sure she's not starving when she wakes up because she CAN get a little cranky when she's hungry, but we love her anyway :)


If you're interested, Meg put together a photobook as a gift for our parents and my grandma.  It's a photographic summary of 2011, starting with last New Year's Eve when we lived it up after finding out our first attempt with IVF had failed and ending with this Christmas.  The link, below, should get you there and you don't need to log in to view it.

The DeBauche Triplets 2011 photobook

Even though I would sell a kidney for a full night's sleep at this point, both Meg and me consider ourselves extremely lucky to have a reason to be so sleep deprived and are looking forward to 2012.  In 2012, our girls will continue to grow, pass milestones, and make us laugh.  I'll continue to blog and share our experiences as long as you continue following along.  Thanks for reading and all of your wonderful comments in 2011!  Have a very Happy New Year!


I'll leave you with a couple of photos that we took during Christmas day and night, that didn't make it into that day's blog post.

As long as Meg and I have been together, we've had Christmas day dinner at her mom's house.  Usually, the table seats about 30 (not kidding).  While this particular Christmas day was pretty much like the day before and after it, ie. changing babies and feeding babies, Meg's stepmom, Jo Anne, sacrificed Christmas with her family, as well as three additional weeks of her life, to be with us and cooked a wonderful meal!  Thanks again for giving us so much of your time and love Jo Anne!




It wouldn't be Christmas dinner if there weren't Duoderm and Tagaderm sitting on the table



Shallee and Kylie came over on Christmas to visit and help with the babies




I took this photo of the girls on Christmas day.  I ended up with two versions--the calm, relaxed version with pacifiers and the out-of-control, screaming baby version on the bottom. We could just pretend that they were just singing Christmas carols, couldn't we?  Which one do you like?